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The Attack of Gobzilla

May 20, 2020

A harrowing tale of survival in the turkey woods. 

 

     It was self defense. I arrived well before daylight to sleuth my way to gobzillas treetop lair. Previously, he and two other thunderchickens had eluded me by avoiding my decoy setup and old nag hen, who must have misplaced her mojo. As I approached the woods to position myself, a thunderous gobble from overhead told me I was dangerously close to the giant’s roost. Freezing in place, I watched and listened to his morning ritual of gobbles and precariously balanced limbstrutting from a mere 60 yards away. I was ready to shoot as soon as he flew down, knowing I would most likely be close to the vicious beast. Finally he bombed toward the forest floor, but away from me. Just out of range, I watched him work through the forest, strutting for an unseen audience. His pompous show and taunting was brazen and deliberate. Slowly he inched my way as he strutted, and I patiently waited for him to make a mistake. A rogue raccoon raced through scaring him off and almost blowing the setup, but his weakness showed - he wanted to come to the lush field behind me, and he began working my way. As he did I found a hole in the brush, and as his head perfectly poked into it, I squeezed the trigger of the shoulder cannon unleashing 3 inches of lead, fire and fury. The lead pelted

his feathery armor, but the beast shook it off like a mere menacing mosquito, and made for a getaway. Aiming again and firing, the second shot had the same effect on the grizzled old warrior, but seemed to confuse him.. or enrage the bird much like poking a bear.  For reasons still unknown, he wheeled, as if possessed, and ran then took flight straight toward me, his dangerously sharp spurs locked on my position. As his massive wingspan eclipsed the sun overhead I swung as he landed dangerously close in the green field, and I delivered the final,  lethal dose of shot to the beast. An autopsy revealed lead poisoning as the cause of death, but it was also rumored to have had ties with the Clinton’s.

 

True story! Yes a bit of fun with telling the story, as well. If you like this article, make sure to sign up to receive our blog, which is usually in depth, serious, & helpful articles on all things whitetail. SINGUP HERE!

 

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